Cerilla, Cheryl and I will meet for the first time tonight!
Yes, I know it’s hard to believe after so many years, but it’s true—tonight is the night of our first date. You might even call it a blind date, and I’m actually getting a bit nervous about it. All I really know is the time of her arrival. I might even hold up a sign with her name on it like everyone else does—glancing expectantly at each fresh face that comes through the door as if asking, “Are you the one I’m looking for?” That gesture will hopefully impress upon her the importance of this prearranged engagement and will definitely add to the suspense and drama. I want to dignify the day in a way that befits the magnitude of what is actually happening here.
This afternoon, it occurred to me that we are both different people now, and in a way have never met before. Technically, that is true every minute of every day, I know, but after a month it’s more pronounced and after very long times, as we all know, the differences can be profound. We’ve both had some unique experiences while being solo, alone this past month. There will be many stories to tell and in the retelling we will each understand a little better what has happened. However, all of that talk is really only the preliminary step leading to the good stuff—and that is, what’s happening right now.
When you stop to think about it, this process of “reunion” is really interesting because trying to “reunify” means: we will have to reconfirm, or create new common ground, reach a few different agreements, reassemble all of the new feelings and ideas in a creative way, and perhaps even write an addendum to our “contract” of sorts. Simply put, make sure love still grows here and it is still a powerful partnership.
Now don’t get me wrong. I’m certainly not suggesting that our relationship is in jeopardy, but I do think it’s just plain healthier to keep re-asking the question: “What’s happening here?” You know what they say about the spelling of the word “assume” (if not, then ask a friend). If we keep building our relationship on the old and possibly out of date assumptions, we could eventually find ourselves standing somewhere that doesn’t show on our map.
Treating this as a blind date may make the difference. Hopefully, in a playful way, we can take full advantage of this chance to open up a little new space in the midst of our habitual patterns. Perhaps we can breathe some new life into our relationship, and maybe even allow just a bit more of that magic dust to settle on our shoulders.
I can see it now. There will be a silent breath of anticipation as she walks through the door. Eyebrows will raise ever so slightly with a questioning lilt—then smiles of recognition will flash over our faces initiating the opening ceremony for this new leg of the adventure.
Sorry! We’ll have to get back to you later with more details, because the rest of this particular story has yet to be written!
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